Okay – also last night I finally got a spark and started Left Unsaid. As in, a paragraph. But let me tell you, starting a book is about as hard as writing one. Editing is the worst. Anyway… here is what is currently the first paragraph. I post it here to intrigue and because I may not use it at all. But even in “Finding Forrester”, Sean Connery's character knew the importance of being able to start and once you start – the ideas pour out.
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Chapter 1 – Left Unsaid
Jonathan was sitting on his lazy boy sipping his second can of beer watching the Monday night game. Dorito crumbs littered his beer stained Chicago Bears sweatshirt. His wife, Adrienne of two years approached him and stood in front of the TV so his attention was interrupted, luckily it was a commercial. His eyes moved upwards - his head stayed put. Her emotionless face glowed from the light of the television as she searched for the right way to tell him what was on her mind. “Honey, I don’t love you anymore.”
4 comments:
lazy boy is a brand name. Should be "La-Z-Boy".
Unless she was facing the TV, this doesn't make sense: "Her emotionless face glowed from the light of the television..."
If she was facing the TV, she wouldn't be facing to Jonathan.
Imagine a dark room, if the only light came from the tv, you would be able to see her from the glow of the light from the tv.
Sorry, I still think her face would be dark from Jonathan's view. I think the TV would cast a shadow over the front of her.
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